The Ballad of the Nokia 2600 (Story McRanterson)

     It was recently pointed out to me by my temporary roomate Shanknasty that these latest posts lack the ranting chops that our readers have come to expect. I don’t really have much of an answer to that. Maybe I’m mellowing out in my old age. Probably not. I think it’s more [...]

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George Clooney For Senate

Due to Ted Kennedy’s untimely passing on Tuesday, there is currently a seat open in the US Senate. Who is the best man for the job?
You guessed it, George Clooney.

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The USS (Useless Shitty Ship) Steve Irwin

     Friday marked the season finale of the Animal Planet show Whale Wars. For those of you unacquainted with the show, it chronicles the voyages of the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, a group opposed to whaling, as they confront Japanese whalers off the coast of Antarctica. While watching, I was amused by their total [...]

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Libraries are for Studying

This Sign – Please Observe 
One of the most shocking things about law school thus far is the lax attitude several law students adopt while spending their time in the law library. There are designated areas for speaking; please, please, please stop. When I go to the library, I barely even breathe. If [...]

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The Haircut

I went to get my hairs cut today, and it was quite an experience, let me tell you (and I will, since this is my post).
The local Costcutters ($13.95 for a “style” cut) is right down the road. I walk in, and I’m greeted by an elderly receptionist, and she asks me what I’d [...]

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Ferret Fanaticism

     There are certain instances in which I really wish that I owned a digital camera. For the most part, I feel that it would be too much of a burden to carry around for limited benefits, and a large possibility of damage or loss. However, there are times when you’re alone and you see something [...]

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BUG

Disclaimer: This post contains information that could possibly ruin the movie “BUG” for you. Ranty McRanterson cannot be held accountable for any real or imagined trauma suffered by reading this post.
**SPOILER ALERT**
**SPOILER ALERT**
     This movie SUCKS. Do not go see it for any reason. Trust me, it’s not what you think. If you really must [...]

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100th Post Celebration!! (But Not Really)

This post sponsored by: Procrastination and Yuengling Traditional Lager
This was going to be the 100th post until I realized that drafts technically count as posts, and there were two drafts from last September. So then I deleted them, making this the 98th post…so the celebration came early. Deal with it.
Changes?
Well, for starters, I took advantage [...]

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Mattiver’s Travels

First of all, I would like to draw everyone’s attention to the return to glory of The Ranty McRanterson. This is the reunion, the epic comeback, the rekindled spirit of a god that was an indian that turned into a wolf. Along with it, a sleek, sexy new look. I just changed it, I didn’t [...]

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Speedy Rantz

New Jersey Sucks
I always have been the standard Pennsylvanian, constantly hating on New Jersey for no good reason. I still frequent their crappy beaches, there’s something about the boardwalk that keeps me coming back. Cheap hermit crabs that never die, deep fat-fried everything, the casinos. Ok, I haven’t really been to the casinos, I haven’t [...]

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