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Archive for the ‘Law School’ Category

From a tort case:
 
In Jensen v. Schooleys Mountain Inn…the defendant bar served alcoholic beverages to Jensen while he allegedly was visibly intoxicated.  After leaving the bar, Jensen drove eight miles, where he “parked his car and, for some unknown reason, began climbing a tree.”  The branches of the tree apparently could not support Jensen’s weight and one broke, causing Jensen to fall twenty feet to the river bank.  Jensen either fell or rolled into the river and drowned.
 
His estate tried to sue the bar for liability for negligently and wrongfully serving the decedent. Thankfully, they lost.

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LOOK AT ME STUDYING, THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD DO

This Sign – Please Observe 

One of the most shocking things about law school thus far is the lax attitude several law students adopt while spending their time in the law library. There are designated areas for speaking; please, please, please stop. When I go to the library, I barely even breathe. If I wanted to talk, my face wouldn’t be buried in my Property book. I would be sitting in the lounge, where, shockingly, talking is encouraged!

No, I don’t give a damn what you did this weekend.

I’m here to use the silence that I can’t get at my apartment because of the crazy guy that lives below me.

I’m here to use the temperature controlled environment that doesn’t smell like urine like the public library.

I’m here to study without having to listen to middle/high/undergraduate/law school girls talk about their crushes and the steaming of milk for your crappy latte at a Starbucks.

I’m here because I have an hour until class and I NEED TO GET THIS READING DONE OR I’M GOING TO GET CALLED ON AND EMBARRASSED WHEN I CAN’T ANSWER; THE PROFESSOR WILL NOT UNDERSTAND THAT I COULDN’T FINISH BECAUSE I WAS TOO BUSY HATING YOU.

asshole move

This is one asshole move that you will not catch me pulling in the near future.

Seriously though, just do your work.

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Vice Dean Jesse Pierson
Vice Dean Jessie Pierson


At a press conference on Friday, Vice Dean Jesse Pierson of Blackacre School of Law announced that the school would like to “continue to foster the ‘grade school’ type of environment” by imposing a mandatory field trip for all first year students to the Philadelphia Zoo in March.

“Students seem to be more receptive to a learning environment that seems more like high school than graduate school.” The field trip is the latest in a long list of changes that Blackacre Law have been established as of late. Vice Dean Pierson also spoke about the addition of lockers, assigned seating, a recess period, classic cafeteria food, and detention for students who are unprepared for class.

“Students have adjusted accordingly,” noticed Professor Palsgraf, who teaches Torts I and II. “I’ve caught students passing notes in class, spreading rumors and perpetuating drama. They also seem to be forming cliques. To the untrained eye, there isn’t much that separates the average law school student from a high school senior.”

Vice Dean Pierson noted that students must have a signed permission slip to go on the trip. Transportation will be provided by large, yellow buses.

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fail candidate

[Click image to enlarge]

This could be an excellent candidate for The FAIL Blog. If only I had a basic image editing program to insert four bold characters.

I can’t believe they sell used books that look like this to unsuspecting first year law students. I have not added any of my own notes to these pages yet, and honestly, if I get called on for this case, I’ll probably just hold up my book and point. I’m sure my Civil Procedure professor will understand.

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