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Posts Tagged ‘Commercials’

     As promised in the promo, this is a new section in Ranty. Yes, the title is 100% lifted from Calvin and Hobbes. As with Calvin’s Great Ideas in Action, I suspect that no one else will think that these are good ideas. Well too damn bad. It’s my blog and I’m going to share my super ideas whose time have not yet come. I’ve always been before my time.

     This idea is for a cable network that shows only commercials. Yes, you read correctly, only commercials. Allow me to explain. I’ve always been a pro with the remote control. My former roommates can attest to that fact. I’m always sure to have a primary and an alternate channel for when the primary goes to commercial. It works passably, but sometimes I am confronted with the situation where my primary and alternate channels have commercials at the same time. This puts me in the unenviable position of having to find a second alternate. I have honed my skills to a point where I can accurately predict when a show is coming back withing three seconds by feel alone. Having to find a second alternate invariably throws my timing off and I am usually late coming back to the primary channel. As a remote control perfectionist, I find this unacceptable.

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     Let’s face it, commercials are annoying. I used to have Direct TV and could record shows and view them later in order to skip over the network’s attempts to pay for the programming that I was enjoying. Unfortunately, due someone moving in with an already existing two year contract, we switched to Comcast. We do not have a DVR and I am frequently forced to find alternate channels during commercial breaks. I am the king of this move, but more often than not all the networks seem to take their commercial breaks at the same time. Irresponsible. The channels that I watch should anticipate my needs and stagger their break times. Come on man, get it together. Anyway, after a few months of having to watch crap commercials, I have a new found appreciation for the great commercials of our time. I’m not talking about stand alone commercials, that would be too easy. Actually too hard. I don’t want to have to go have to think about this post all that much. I’ll do three of my favorites.

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